When we talk about inequality, the first few terms that come to mind are racial inequality, gender inequality, and inequality of opportunity. However, have you ever heard of pleasure inequality?
A recent survey by Durex India has raised a deeply unsettling yet crucial question about the rising pleasure inequality in Indian society. According to the survey, a staggering 70% of Indian women reported being sexually unsatisfied. Another study revealed that 45% of Indian females admitted to faking their orgasms.
Now, I understand that this topic might be controversial, sensitive, or even taboo for many. However, my intent is notto make anyone uncomfortable but to shed light on a serious societal issue that demands attention.
In fact, the issue of female pleasure and sexual well-being is not just about personal satisfaction; it is deeply intertwined with social conditioning, gender norms, and even legal frameworks. Let’s break it down.
The Suppression of Female Pleasure in India: A Harsh Reality
The stigmatization of female pleasure in India is so extreme that clitoral mutilation is still practiced in certain regions. According to an India Today report, some communities consider the clitoris—a female reproductive part responsible for pleasure—as a “source of sin”. In these communities, girls undergo female genital mutilation (FGM) to ensure they remain “pure.”
Shockingly, India has no specific laws to prevent FGM, which has led to the country becoming a global hub for the practice. According to a report by The Littoral Hood, people from countries like Australia and the UK even travel to India to have FGM performed on their daughters.
But this issue is not limited to India alone. In many Middle Eastern countries, a brutal practice exists where, after childbirth, women’s vaginas are stitched shut to prevent them from experiencing pleasure. Even in a developed country like the UK, over 5,000 cases of FGM were registered in just one year (2017).
Clearly, female pleasure suppression is not just an Indian problem—it is a global issue.
Ancient India’s Open Mindset on Female Pleasure
Contrary to the modern-day perception of female pleasure as taboo, ancient Indian culture celebrated and acknowledged it.
- In Hindu mythology, Rati, the Goddess of Female Pleasure, was considered the consort of Kamadeva, the God of Love and Desire.
- The Mahabharata (Section 12) narrates a story about King Bhangaswan, who was cursed by Indra to become a woman. Later, when Indra offered to reverse the curse, Bhangaswan chose to remain a woman because he found greater pleasure in a female body.
- Historian Seema Anand, in an interview with the Times of India, revealed that ancient India had female pleasure toys, which were customized according to women’s anatomy. Even in 300 BC, such discussions were not taboo.
- The Rati Rahasya, an 11th-century pleasure manual, documented erogenous zones that varied according to the lunar cycle. It provided scientific and detailed insights into female arousal points.
This evidence raises a critical question: If ancient Indian society was so open-minded about female pleasure, how did we regress into a culture that actively suppresses it?
The Roots of Pleasure Inequality in India
The answer lies in deep-rooted societal conditioning and the flawed association of purity with virginity.
- Virginity as a Measure of Purity
- Ads promoting hymen reconstruction (hymenoplasty) are common in small towns.
- A Reuters survey (2013) found that 77% of Indian men prefer a virgin bride.
- However, 50% of these same men have admitted to visiting prostitutes at least once in their lives.
This hypocrisy reflects how virginity is an unfair burden placed only on women.
- Educators Reinforcing Toxic Beliefs
- A Jadavpur University professor, Kanak Sarkar, once compared a virgin girl to a sealed bottle, implying that women lose value after sexual activity.
- When educators hold such beliefs, how can we expect society to think any differently?
- Women’s Own Silence on the Issue
- A 2015 Hindustan Times survey found that 72% of married Indian women were sexually dissatisfied.
- According to a research paper, only 50% of women achieve orgasms through vaginal intercourse alone. However, if manual and oral stimulation are included, this number jumps to 86%.
- Despite this, only 12% of women admitted to receiving satisfying oral stimulation from their partners.
- Worse still, a 2023 India Today survey revealed that 45.2% of Indian women fake their orgasms.
The harsh truth? If women don’t express their desires, how can they expect their partners to fulfill them?
Beyond Pleasure: Gender Inequality in Everyday Life
The inequality doesn’t stop at sexual pleasure—it extends to daily life, food habits, financial independence, and decision-making.
- Food Inequality
- A 2017 UN survey in Uttar Pradesh found that 85% of women eat last in their households—despite being the ones who cook the food.
- This practice is not limited to rural areas. Even in urban conservative families, men and children eat first.
- Financial Inequality
- An Indian Express report states that 50% of Indian women have no financial independence.
- A CNBC-TV18 survey of 10,000 working women found that 67% still depend on male family members for financial decisions.
- Sexual Control and Male Domination
- Society expects women to remain sexually pure, but doesn’t hold men to the same standards.
- This has led to a rising demand for hymenoplasty surgeries. According to Apollo Hospitals, the demand has increased by 20-30%, with most patients being women aged 20-30.
Where Do We Go From Here?
Mumbai-based psychologist Dr. Priyanka Shah states that an unhappy woman in a sexually unfulfilling marriageasks herself three questions:
- Is he a good father?
- Is he financially stable?
- Is he emotionally supportive?
If the answer to these questions is “yes,” then sexual satisfaction is ignored.
This mindset has severe consequences, not just for individual happiness but for society as a whole. A country that fails to acknowledge female desires creates an unbalanced, unjust, and emotionally suppressed society.
Final Thoughts
Pleasure inequality is not just about sex—it’s about how society treats women in every aspect of life.
🔹 Ancient India was open-minded about female pleasure.
🔹 Modern India has regressed, imposing purity standards and male-dominated decision-making on women.
🔹 To bring real change, women must demand equality—not just in education and jobs but in personal desires too.
It’s time to question: If our ancient culture respected female pleasure, why shouldn’t we?
What do you think about pleasure inequality in India? Share your thoughts in the comments!
